Thank you for reading our free, copyrighted report discussing the factors to consider on how to improve your web sites relevancy and appearance for viewers and search engines. This is just one article in a series of free articles (for more see the navigational bar on the left).
You took the time to visit this page and, if your web site is important to you, I ask that you print this out, and take the time to read this, with out being rushed. Some of the ideas may benefit your site. Thank you.
This article addresses:
Web Design Layout Issues: Animated Gif's, Graphics, Java, Scrolling Text, HTML Creation, Splash Screens and Web Page topics.
and is entitled...
"Has Your Web Page Had Too Much Viagra? How to Tell if You Have A 'Full Monty' Site."
I was about ten and school was out and summer vacation had just begun. Mom and I were at the lake, swimming. The big kids (high school) had been diving off the high board and now were hangin' out, drinking coca-cola's and listening to Sam the Sham and the Pharaoh's sing "Hey, there little Miss Red Riding Hood..." You know how it is, little kids notice the big kids, but the big kids don't really notice the little kids.
"Look! Mom! Look at me!" I jumped off the diving board - feet first of course - didn't quite yet have the nerve to dive. I swam back, climbed up the ladder and once more yelled, "Look! Mom! Look at me!" As you might imagine this went on quite a bit that day. Mom was cool
(the water was cooler), she looked and smiled and approved.
Or at least doing a pretty good job at pretending she was
impressed. But the other people at the lake, they probably didn't care too much for my antics. But I cared, and I was working up my courage to dive, instead of jump, just like those big kids.
I see a lot of sites, that have the "Hey! I want to get noticed. 'Look! Mom! Look at me!' " syndrome. It can take many different forms. That exploding Pakistani nuclear bomb flashing "new" icon, the Elvis-hips gyrating "hot" icon, the animated e-mail gif that puts the Energizer Bunny to shame by putting itself in the mail box, over and over and over. The music that takes forever to load, finally plays the digitized-Muzak-version-of-electrons-wishing-they-were-in-an-elevator music (but only if you happen to have Real Audio downloaded, oh - and a sound card - 32 bit, and speakers and time) and doesn't have a stop or off button or the site that dictates "Best viewed with Netscape 4.04 or higher, 800x600 screen setting, a .26 dpi - Sony 19" monitor and a glass of wine from a bottle with a cork. Please correct your settings."
Umm, the only thing I think I will correct is the web page I chose to visit.
I don't know how you are, but I tend to ignore these pages, they are just a bit too excited. These "feeling a little perky" sites have ingested a few too many milligrams of Viagra for my taste.
Recently my wife and I watched the movie "The Full Monty," in brief, for those who haven't laughed their way through it, it was about several English males who need to earn money, so they put on a Chippendale's-like show, showing everything... thus "The Full Monty." Which leads us to the corollary topic of this document: Do you have a "Full Monty" site?
I have had many people come to me and ask for a site evaluation. On a few, well, more than a few, I think what the person was really looking for some form of external validation that he had really "tweaked his site out," and just wanted me to tell them they had a nice site
(gosh, I was now put in the role of being the approving
"Mom"). They have the scrolling type across the bottom, the spinning Internet Explorer logo
(hey, I do like Microsoft, but why advertise them on your site?) and the "You are number 432,897 visitor since yesterday" hit counter. (Now, just a word about visible counters. Don't use them. If the number is really low, visitors ask why they are at your site since nobody else is; if they are high, your competitors will copy your site and attempt to use your ideas; if your counter ALWAYS says the number 23,456, well, you just need a new gif, and if your counter is really, really high, no one will believe you. It may also cause your visitor to wonder that if you stretching the truth about a hit counter, what else are you "fibbing" about. Ask for our free report on using logs instead of counters.)
The creator of this site has too much going on, too many distractions, drawing my attention away from the real product or service, if there is one, that should be emphasized.
Why do people do it? Why do they put every conceivable option into view?
It really is quite simple -- people do it because they can.
Now, I like football as much as anybody. But the full-body shimmy, high kicking strut, fist-pumping dance that now seems to occur if a player just happens to get close to someone who actually made the big play, kinda' rubs me the wrong way. A favorite quote of mine was from the coach to the player, who said, "Son, when you get in the end zone, act like you been there before." I would like to modify that and say,
"Webmaster, when you get a visitor, act like you have had one before."
Yes, there is a time and a place for a little celebration in all of our successes, so I am not saying do away with all the "Wu-Wu," nor am I advocating vanilla web sites with links to Disney, the Osmonds, Barney and Mr. Rogers; diversity is what makes America great. Obviously create your web site with your audience in mind, and yes, there are some pages that need to look like you had Dennis Rodman has an artistic consultant, but, exploding fireworks and Captain Picard saying "Engage" after every page viewed by a visitor to your site, I don't think so...
Visit some of the busiest sites on the net:
and observe how many blatant animated gif's, how much over-hype they have on their site. They really have a clean layout and they focus on content. And they are just well done (well, except yahoo). If you are going to copy something, emulate them.
If the people who take the time to "sizzle" their site visually, took half that amount of time to optimize their HTML for search engine relevancy
(hey, we have that free report too) they would fare much better then offering a site that looks like it is trying to turn Mother Teresa into a Christie Brinkley look alike.
Oh yeah, I finally got the courage to dive head first. Of course, I was yelling, "Look! Mom! Look at me!" as I went... and the only sound louder than me calling for my mother's attention was the splat as I hit the water's cement like surface; apparently is was a little bit of thunder, as when I came up not only Mom was looking, but even a few other beach goers, and ohmigawd, even a big kid had noticed. Now that hurt. Later I would learn the term for this was "belly flop" and it stung, but not as much as my ego did at the time. Mom, never said anything, neither did I; and neither did anybody else at the lake that day, I think they just ignored me because they were embarrassed for me, or more realistically just didn't care.
Moral of the story: when you work hard to get people to notice you, and they finally do, just make sure it is for what you have done and not because of a "belly flop."
You want to make sure your visitors find you, work on making your site relevant for the search engines.
You want to make sure your visitors like your site when then visit, work on your visual layout and ease of navigation.
You want to make sure your visitors don't leave your site until they have found what they want, so, if your site is feeling a little "frisky," consider lowering your site's Viagra dosage and keeping some of it for yourself.
Contact us to see how we can help create or enhance your internet presence.
OUR SERVICES TO YOU
We offer a wide range of Internet design, creation and management services from:
Internet Presence Creation (How much for that page in the (browser) window?)
Design Composition and Optimization
(Please note that our web site, is sorta' like the cobblers children, who have no shoes... we have been so busy on projects, we have struggled to get all of our content up-loaded.)
Structural Architecture Composition and Optimization
Content Composition and Optimization
Meta Tag Keyword Composition and Optimization
Web Page Title Composition and Optimization
Image Description Composition and Optimization
Meta Descriptions Composition and Optimization
Keyword and Content Correlation (tying it all together with a bow)
YOUR INVESTMENT IN WEB DESIGN
Now, how much does it cost to have a web page presence designed? Well, it is sorta' like asking how much is it for a car? Are we talking a 68 Plymouth, a 94 Camaro, a 98 Lexus? Do you want an AM radio or CD player, vinyl or leather seats, air bags with that? Obviously, the price can vary, depending on what you want and need. Please direct me to a few sites that have a layout and structure similar to what you envision and then I can prepare pricing - thanks.
RESUSCITATING (DYING) WEB PAGES
(HELP! I've fallen and I can't get up.)
Meta Tag Keyword Determination and Composition We work with each client to create an informative reference for search engine indexing, including constructing keywords and imbedding the meta tags. In HTML language. Extensive client participation may be required.
Web Page Title Structure and Optimization Each title of a web page will be reviewed and optimized for optimal search engine indexing.
Image Description and Analysis We determine if your images are benefiting or detracting from your site and make specific recommendations accordingly.
Meta Descriptions We will review or create your meta descriptions and prepare for HTML imbedding.
Keyword Correlation We present strategies for correlating keywords across all components which are indexed by the search engines. Client responsible for integration into desired text.
Site Integration Review of all components for consistency and relevancy.
Content Composition and Review Visible content and composition is reviewed and we verbally communicate or edit recommendations to optimize your content for search engine indexing. Client responsible for integration into desired text.
INTERNET PRESENCE PROMOTION
(Driving traffic to your site -- Head 'em up, move
SEARCH ENGINE SUBMISSION
Once your page is completed, you will need to submit it to the Search Engines.
Search Engine Submission to Major Engines. A critical component of our service includes presenting your new web site to all the major Web search engines and directories, including: AltaVista, WebCrawler, Lycos, Infoseek, Excite, and HotBot. (Yahoo is available for an extra fee of $25. Yahoo accepts only about of 1/3rd of all submissions.) $25 base fee per unique address
Search Engine Submission to Additional Engines. Although the major engines will account for most of your visits, we will also submit via automated software, your site to another 50+ engines.
$25 base fee+ $10 per unique address
Search Engine Submission for Additional Web Pages. To further promote your site, we submit additional key pages to both major and additional search engines. After the $35 base fee, $15 per unique additional address.
DOMAIN NAME REGISTRATION
Domain name registration -- $25 if you know the name you want and if you have verified it is available, plus Internic fees $35 per year, paid 2 years in advance ($70)
If you are interested in learning more about how to improve your web site, please contact me at 877-944-6100
(hey, that is a toll free number - call now).
Whew, well you made it to the end. Hey, this is only the introductory part, wait till we get to the details!
© copyright 1997-2001 (One of my clients showed me an easy way to check for copyright infringements -- it works every time!)
By the way, we are looking to affiliate with competent, fun, talented, creative, honest, (well, you get the idea) individuals who may want to work with us. If you think we could some how, some way make a good match, or gosh -- even good friends, e-mail me and we can discuss this option. Thanks!